I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
