remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
