Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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