If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
