stop calling my apartment porn island.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize