Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
In America we eat man semen.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Boobs are out for the taking
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize