Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
