Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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