so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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