is wine microwaveable?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
