I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
