i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
