So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
