She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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