Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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