I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Dignity is for republicans.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
