you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
