ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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