Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
