Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize