Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
