dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
