Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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