He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
