bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
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