marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
