we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Are we still banned from the library?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
