Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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