i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
