Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
