we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
