I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
