it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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