Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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