I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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