I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize