Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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