He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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