They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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