We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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