Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
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