Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
