one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
God, I missed his penis.
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