he referred to my room as the tit cave...
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
