Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
i believe in u and ur pee
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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