yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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