how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
