fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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