i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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