Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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